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User blog:THEJJRAT/The Sims 2: Final Egg of the TIme of yes
Spaghettiville, 2009 Ah, Spaghettiville. What a wonderful town, with all the fast food and chemicals in the air. A great vacation spot! Even people from other universes (and galaxies) agree. Take the Shepard family, for instance. Commander Shepard's a clone of a famous war hero, and he's one mean/brave/seductively badass/etc mo' fuckeh. Tali'Zorah Vas Normandy is a quarian engineer with a godly hip-to-waist ratio, and the duo are madly in love. After their most recent adventure, involving a valcano filled with magic dinosaur sharks and a golden toothbrush, they decided to take a break from their galaxy exploring - and their group - and take a vacation to Earth. In Earth-420. In SimNation. In Spaghettiville. All alone, all to themselves, and a computer, a town full of wacko time travelers, and a bed that is about to experience many steamy and drunken nights. They arrive to their newly bought house via taxi, and Tali celebrates by passionately kissing her human partner. They had learned, through many years of experience, how to kiss with a glass helmet dome thing on. Shepard agrees with this and goes fishing with their house moat thingy majig, while Tali discovers that the house came with a fucking boombox thing. She jammed out for hours, while Shepard failed to fish for hours as the moat didn't come with fish, you fucking idiot. Did that cloning process put a dick in your brain, Mr. Fucknut McGee? Anywho, hours later, Torchwood gained intel that a new family had arrived. They sent their best men on the job; awaiting to meet the new faces. Shepard instantly knew who they were; or, atleast, who one of them were. It was one of those pesky Doctors, that guy dude who later turned into a giant head, and some other guy he hadn't seen before. It didn't take long for a dance off to occur, the Doctor showing off his freaky moves. However, Shepard looked on in depression as he realized that he couldn't dance with Tali, as she was the one generating the music that they were currently dancing to. The gay dude was furiously showing off the moves he learned during the Vietnam War; while the Doctor starts laughing like a maniac. This deeply disturbing the others, but this didn't stop the heated dance off in progress. The Doctor, sick of falling on his ass every nine seconds, decides to go inside and take a big, fat, solid, hard, crusty, sweaty, triangle-shaped, painful, sharp glob of poo and play computer games. This caused the phone to ring, causing Shepard to answer it, thus causing Tali to stop dropping mixtapes as the phone call was for her. As the heated dance off had ended, Ianto and Harkness bragged over how delicious their moves were and how they megarekt quikscopd the Doctor. Tali picked up the phone, and realized it was a telimarketer that wanted to sell her a magazine. She kindly declined, but was shown to eighty different products and eventually ended up buying it to shut her up hours later. Meanwhile, the Doctor had one of the most troubling moments of his entire hundreds of years of life. He attempted to get a newspaper and drain it of it's knowledge juice, but a gift box cut away his hopes and dreams with a circumision knife. He then decides to go eat Shepard's famous macaroni and cheese, while Tali is cut in half by the sliding door. She doesn't mind, and eats away her mac n' cheese while nanobots glue her back together and seal the suit before she is filled with yucky alternate universe germs. Ianto discusses TVs with Shepard, who promptly tells him to shut the fuck up and eat his dinner. SPELLCHECK ON WP Category:Blog posts